I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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