So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
