Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Just invented taco cereal.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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