I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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