i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
