So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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