you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
