She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
