office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Operation Purity has been aborted
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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