So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
