i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
do herpes really smell.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize