theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
