summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
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