Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
