My sheets look like a crime scene.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
