Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Your penis caused this!
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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