She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize