i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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