At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
