I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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