you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
