Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
