It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Hippo gnu deer
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
