therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
