i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
