There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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