god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
