yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
we're so committed to being not committed
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize