Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
