its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Less talking, more tequila
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
