I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
