She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
i black out too much to be "responsible"
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
