My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
My vagina just clenched in fear
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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