I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
