well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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