spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
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