Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
