Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
