so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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