Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
