We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
