You're so nebulous sometimes
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Randomize
