Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
God I need to hump something, right now.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
