you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize