WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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