You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
