Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I have demons in me.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
