i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize