There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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