i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
